


You See Right Through Me

by Cinnamonbookworm



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: 4x11 AU, F/M, Post 4x11, cs coffee, episode rewrite, implied coffee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-18
Updated: 2014-12-18
Packaged: 2018-03-02 00:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2792816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinnamonbookworm/pseuds/Cinnamonbookworm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I wanted to do this because I know I wasn’t the only one who came away slightly dissatisfied with the captain swan scenes in that ep (especially the last one), so consider this a kind-of au for you all to make up for the lack of time in that episode</p>
            </blockquote>





	You See Right Through Me

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the Tow’rs song Whiskey and Wine (there’s a war inside of me that i try to hide / boy you see right through me every time / melted by the look in your eyes)

His kiss didn’t feel right. To be truthful, none of them had felt right since she’d exploded the side wall of the sheriff’s station. She’d blamed it on him not wanting to set off her magic. Or being slightly afraid of her, despite what he’d said. Or anything having to do with her, because the problem was always her, and always had been. 

This one feels like it isn’t just her though. He feels wrong. His lips aren’t soft on hers, but hard and cold, like he’s faking it. But he’s Killian, her Killian, why would he be faking it?

He didn’t answer her question asking if he was okay. Not really.

And his hands are shaking and stiff when he touches her.

And then, then she runs in through the doors of the clocktower and Gold is holding a heart and she just knows that its Killians. He’s in so much pain that it’s practically hurting her heart. And she’s about to shoot a fireball, her magic bubbling up inside her when the Dark One freezes her.

And he may have kept her from moving, but he didn’t keep her from watching. But Belle - Belle, who they hadn’t even known was there - saved him, saved all of them, really (because who knows what Gold was going to do with that hat and his heart).

Gold and Belle disappear in a puff of red smoke and Emma unfreezes and the fireball shoots over everyone’s heads and almost burns through the clock face, but burns out before it gets there and she runs to him as fast as possible and hugs him as tight as she can.

She can’t talk about this now, though.

She can’t talk to him about how he almost broke that promise about surviving or about how its all her fault that she didn’t notice that his heart was missing or about how she doesn’t even begin to deserve him.

She can’t talk about this now because he’s handed her his heart (literally) and she’s holding it in her hands and she can’t give it back to him, not now, she can’t tell him that he doesn’t deserve her when he’s giving her this kind of trust.

So when she does give it back, she shoves it in quickly -like ripping off a bandaid- and hopes she can rip off the bandaid of not deserving him that easily too, but she’s stalling and she’s rambling because she doesn’t want to lose him. She literally can’t lose him. But she has to because how could she not have noticed that his heart had been taken?

But then he’s kissing her like he hasn’t since that night in the street. And it might even be better than that and this kiss, oh this kiss feels so so right. So she lets her guard down. She lets her walls down. And lets him take her into his room because she may not deserve him but he most definitely doesn’t deserve to get his heart broken after the hell he just experienced.

Afterwards, she decides to stay. She decides to stay with him because he makes her feel safe and at home and while she may be selfish as hell for staying with someone who is so much more selfless than her after her not seeing what she should’ve from the start.

And she can talk to him later. Because he’s still trying to explain to her how everything happened and how he did it all for her because -get this he feels he’s not worthy, of her- and the best way to assure him that he most definitely is is to stay with him.

She can talk to him about all of this in the morning light.


End file.
